"I Kinda Like the Way That Line Runs Up the Back of the Stocking..."

Comedian Jonathan Katz has a wry style that is gold for those with hankering for the verbal play and the inappropriate. The guy is pure dead-pan, which becomes half the joke. Years ago, I flipped on the TV and saw a bald guy addressing an audience, and absolutely slayed me with the following story (my paraphrase):

True story. A polar bear cub asks his mother, "Am I illegitimate?"

The mother answers, "Absoultely not. You are my only son whom I love."

Cub asks again, "Are you sure I'm not illegitimate?"

Mother answers, "Yes I am."

Cub asks, "Is dad a polar bear?"

Mother answers, "Yes, he is."

Cub asks, "Are you sure he is a polar bear?"

Mother answers, "Yes I am. This really hurts me that you think this. Why are you questioning if we are polar bears?"

Cub answers, "Because I'm f---ing freezing!"

Be warned, in my history of plagerizing this joke, I've only seen two reactions: complete hysterics or steam coming out of their ears when they realized I've wasted one minute of their life with such banalities.

Anyway, with this in mind, I think Dr. Katz would find this funny:

Northern hunters, scientists and people with vivid imaginations have discussed the possibility for years.

But Roger Kuptana, an Inuvialuit guide from Sachs Harbour, Northwest Territories, was the first to suspect it had actually happened when he proposed that a strange-looking bear shot last month by an American sports hunter might be half polar bear, half grizzly.

Territorial officials seized the creature after noticing its white fur was scattered with brown patches and that it had the long claws and humped back of a grizzly. Now a DNA test has confirmed that it is indeed a hybrid - possibly the first documented in the wild.

"We've known it's possible, but actually most of us never thought it would happen," said Ian Stirling, a polar bear biologist with the Canadian Wildlife Service in Edmonton.

Polar bears and grizzlies have been successfully paired in zoos before - Stirling could not speculate why - and their offspring are fertile.

Breeding seasons for the two species overlap, though polar bear gets started slightly earlier.

How could the polar bear possibly resist the humped back of the grizzly? It may be the most provocative natural feature in the wild. You think Salmon jump into their laps because they like being turned into sushi?

Tell me a good bear joke if you have one.